The Holder of Toes was once the Holder of Machinations, a being concerned with plans to halt someone else's progress. As such, His domain is filled with traps with this theming. However, once Legion took His Object, took it a thousand times until the Holder was stripped of it for eternity, He has found solace in others' vulnerability. The toes are important for walking and usually unnoticed, and so His attention was drawn to them. Do not call Him "The Holder of Toes" to His face.

He may not pick you to go to His domain, for reasons I will explain after the ritual proper. However, if you fall under any of these categories, you risk dying in your sleep if you attempt this:

  1. You have experienced growing pains or difficulty walking because specifically of how long your toes are.
  2. You come from a culture in which toes are regarded as secondary sexual characteristics in females or implements of supernatural/spiritual properties.

To access this realm, you must write "I wish to obtain the Object of Machinations." on a piece of paper, crumple it up, and dispose of it in a discreet and irreversible way, a holdover from His old trial. If you don't do this, the Holder will ignore you, except in extraneous circumstances which you shouldn't worry about if you follow what I said above.

Climb into your own bed, wearing shoes which are far too large lengthwise. It is recommended that you dress as if you are to go hiking, as you will only carry your clothing when you enter His realm. If you wish to use this guide within the dream, print it out and wear it as you would a bracelet (but not an anklet).

As you fall sleep, you will hear what sounds like of people constantly whispering. Do not open your eyes, or else it won't work and you will have to start over again. Try to fall asleep despite any discomfort you may feel. Remember, He will not harm you; you are not trying to take His Object.

Once you are asleep, you will have a dream about a jungle. The whispers will not have abated, and may have grown louder. Depending on how straight your toes are already, you may know that He notices them. If you feel your toes shifting against your control, your toes have probably caught His attention for their lack of quality. If so, do not fret. He will accept anyone's toes.

There is a path marked, and you must walk along it. If He is reshaping your toes, He will stop once you begins walking. Trees will surround you if you go off the path, forcing you to spend the rest of your life there, screaming until your voice becomes a whisper like the ones you heard as you slept.

You will come to a gate which is locked. You will see a man leering at you; this is His approximation of Legion as a young man. His face will be grotesque and misshapen, his feet merely poles. He will growl at you like a dog and bark, "There is no Holder here! I, Mighty Legion, have stolen it!"

You must respond with something like, "I simply wish to see Him; I do not seek His Holder." You do not need to say this exactly, but you should definitely get across that you don't seek His Object.

At this, you will blink and there will only be a field. Now, no matter how crooked and battered your toes are, you will find that He is straightening them. Perhaps you can look around in the dream; there isn't much to see, but if you would ever like to see the edge of reality, you can. I will not describe it here, as everyone sees it differently. Know, though, that the field is very underwhelming as a whole, and it's better for you to just go down the path. You will come to a temple, and when you go inside, you will see a large beast. He is pig-headed; brown or red scales cover His body and His legs most resemble tree trunks.

There will be a chair. Sit down and make yourself comfortable. He understands all languages; if you wish to ask Him for cushions or sandals, He will make those appear. When you are ready, take off your shoes and spread your toes out. Do not be alarmed if He bats at or smells your toes. Simply tell Him what you want Him to do to your toes. Before He touches your toes, you may feel like your toes are nearing a fire. Don't worry; He will not harm your toes.

I must warn you that He is incapable of speech. Many Seekers (or just people who want their toes massaged by a god) have mistakenly assumed He was dissatisfied with their toes and have run from His frightening expression. It is one of sadness, not anger or disappointment.

There are a few rules, though:

  1. At no point may your toes touch the ground. If this happens, it is assumed that your soul will simply vanish, leaving your body to be inhabited by another's.
    1. You can ask to walk around. In that case, He will conjure something else for you to stand on.
  2. Do not ask about Holders/Seekers/Objects. Just do not.
  3. You may only touch Him with your toes. If you touch Him with anything else, He will have no qualms about burning you.
    1. Do not attempt to touch Him with your toes without warning Him first. His body is extremely hot, and you may burn your toes if He does not cool down that area of His skin in time. This will anger Him immensely
  4. Do not, at any point, put your original shoes back on. You must tell Him when you want to leave.

After you tell Him that you wish to leave, you will wake up. Your feet will be bare, and your toes may have grown more aquiline if you desired this. However, know that your toes will be sensitive to cold

There are many who do this ritual. Some wish to have their toes played with, but feel uncomfortable expressing this. Some hope that the Holder will improve how their toes look in a certain way. Some wish to meet a Holder who is relatively harmless. Some come to learn about things they would not otherwise know (though do realize that He is not the Holder of Knowing, and He may not know certain things).

However, some have a far greater plan. There are some people who wish to eradicate a genetic disease from their bloodline, such as cancer, Huntington's disease, or cystic fibrosis. The Holder cannot or will not do this in a single generation; multiple generations must work together to eradicate these defects in their genetic code.

But the price is far too high.

You see, every time one goes into the domain of The Holder of Toes, they cede their soul to him. Over time, the Holder will tire of simply having them there and will take control of their soul, nudging them into a specific series of actions, causing entire civilizations to rewrite their sexual rules, and damning every child to meeting him unconsciously. He has turned entire realms to His satisfaction in this manner.

These realms have, for better or worse, become His Object, numberless and innumerable. If you have reached them, it is far too late; He already holds you by the toes.

Credited to Squidmanescape

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