Have a Funnel Day

I am not really a big fan of Funnel Vision. I do watch it once in a while but only when I’m bored out of my mind. I do chuckle a little bit but I am bothered by all the fart jokes and everything else. One day however, something happened that traumatized me so much that I stopped watching them for quite a while before I just gained the courage to watch them again.

But first I need to explain what Funnel Vision is. Funnel Vision is a family friendly Youtube channel about a family in their daily lives. There's Duddy, Mommy, Chase, Mike etc. etc. they also have a majority of other channels too, like FGTeeV, Doh Much Fun and SkylanderBoyandGirl. It also at one point became victim to Youtube’s “advertiser friendly” deal during the whole elsagate thing. But there was a video on Youtube that seemed to be a very unsettling fan video that no one saw except for me, this is my story.

One night, I was looking through Youtube, bored out of my mind and  wondering what to watch. When an idea popped into my head: I was going to watch M&M gaming 13’s rants on Funnel Vision, with the soul intention of seeing all the hate comments from hardcore fans and getting a good laugh out of me.

While watching one of his rants and going deep into the comments, there were a few comments agreeing with M&M gaming 13, and a majority of them being hate comments backlashing at him. 

Eventually, I scrolled by a comment that caught my eye. It was by a user named “12fg38tee39v” I was confused by the username but shrugged it off as one of those stupid usernames people put in at times. I inspected the comment itself, it said: “here M&M this is for u” then right below that was a Youtube link. Luckily, I already had an account on youtube so I could click on the link freely. 

The link led to a video that to this day, still haunts me. The title of the video was “for M&M gaming 13,” the thumbnail was a low quality picture of Funnel Boy. I just thought this would be just a rant backlashing at M&M gaming 13 for hating Funnel Vision, but in reality, it was going to be so stupid and fail horribly at it’s main goal.

The video starts with a black screen for 10 seconds before it faded into a shot of Funnel Vision’s house at night, there was no sound at all, just dead silence.

The video continued with constant jump cuts to different rooms of the house. One thing disturbed me though, the house was completely empty, every single bedroom including Oreo’s cage was empty. I started to question what happened to the family. I just thought was that they were on vacation, but my instincts told me that something a lot worse happened to them.

After all the jump cuts, it then switched to their farm (Yes, they have a farm now) Once again, dead silence and all of the animal’s respective places were empty. Now I knew they weren't on vacation, after all, who the hell brings donkeys, chickens, and goats on vacation? It honestly baffled me but I kept watching, hoping to find some sort of answer.

The video then cut to black again for 5 seconds until it fades into a shot of some sort of basement. I’m not sure if Funnel Vision has a basement, but even if they do, I don’t think it’s this messed up. It was dark and the floor was dirty. In the back of the room, there was a rusty door that was torn off its hinges. The doorway opened up to a dark room I couldn’t really make out. On the floor, their were some costumes from both Funnel Vision and Fgteev. Such as the Pikachu costume and the Funnel Boy costume, they seem to have been collecting dust too.

It stayed on this shot for a while before it cut to a shot of Funnel Boy’s face with a darker tint to it. the image stayed on the screen for a second, and the bounce sound from the intro for Funnel Vision played and then it cut back to the same room. 

I thought this part nothing special until I looked closer. In the Funnel Boy costume, there was a giant tear where its mouth should be and inside of it, there was a rotting arm. It was just dangling out of the costume and seemed to have busted the threads on Funnel Boy’s face when the person inside was still presumably alive and struggled to escape. My heart sank at the sight of that. However, something kept me glued to the screen.

It proceeded to cut to the same image of Funnel Boy for one second, each time the picture would worsen in quality to the point where it’s just a colorful blob and the boing sound effect getting louder and louder until it’s just a loud screech-like sound. It then cut to the same room again and again and each time more and more objects and body parts started appearing. I put two and two together and eventually, I started to notice each object was a symbol of the Funnel Vision family, for example, there was a phone with a cracked screen that signified Lexi, and a M.I.K.E shirt in tatters obviously signified Mike. I was shaking in fear and just waiting for this freaking video to end.

After a few anxiety filled minutes, just watching this room gain more and more objects and body parts, the video faded to black and stayed like that for 5 seconds before plain text colored red faded on to the screen. A booming, deep voice bellowed out of my computer speakers that read the text on the screen, it said “HAVE A FUNNEL DAY!!!” I jumped and instantly turned down the volume. The voice then chuckled quietly and then the video ended.

I was frozen in fear, I didn’t know what to think or what to do. When I went to sleep days after that, I had a lot of nightmares about me being one of the body parts in that basement.

After that event, I've never been the same, I've been much more paranoid and I got much less sleep, all of this would’ve been prevented if I didn’t click that link.