One of Derpy's favorite things to do is helping mommy. Mommy is always running around the house and doing all kinds of things, and the house is really big, and there's all kinds of stuff inside, so Derpy gets to help a lot.
Right now, Derpy wants to help make muffins because they're her favorite. She even knows where the flour is (it's in one of the big cabinets in the kitchen), but when she tries to get it out of the cabinet it gets all over because the bag is really big and she can't always move so good and mommy says “Look at the mess you made! Go play somewhere else!”
But Derpy doesn't cry or anything even though mommy was loud. Since mommy won't let her help in the kitchen, Derpy wants to go play with Miss Sweetie, that's her favorite doll, Miss Sweetie. She's her favorite one because she's yellow and Derpy likes yellow most of all. Derpy's mane is yellow, and so is mommy. Mommy is yellow all over. Derpy knows all the colors. She knows red, and blue, and green, and purple, and especially yellow because that's her favorite.
Derpy hopes that mommy is gonna make muffins today. She likes muffins a whole lot, but one time she ate too many and it felt sickish, but it's okay because they're still her favorite. Purple muffins are the best and Derpy likes it when she gets to eat the purple muffins.
Derpy has to stay inside most days. Mommy and daddy say that little ponies should stay inside where they can't get lost. But sometimes they'll take her places, too. Like one time they went to a place where there were lots of ponies and some of the ponies had hats on and some were running around with cows and things but Derpy got scared at all the ponies and started crying so they had to leave but she didn't really want to.
One time, they took Derpy to school, too. School was a different big house with lots of other little ponies like her (not big ones like mommy and daddy). There was a pony there who was big and looked like daddy but he wasn't daddy but Derpy still wasn't scared, either. Everyone was talking all over and Derpy got real excited and wanted to talk too, but Derpy can't talk so good, but it's okay because everyone was happy. Then later every pony got quiet and the big pony was saying things and Derpy wanted to say stuff too, but he said “No talking in class,” so Derpy tried to not say things but it was a long, long time and sometimes she forgot and then she had an accident on herself and that made her cry and everyone got loud again. Derpy didn't really like school, but it's okay because she gets to stay inside now.
Daddy isn't home most of the time, but she likes when daddy comes home because daddy isn't loud like mommy. Daddy teaches Derpy things too, like colors. Daddy says Derpy is a “pegasiss” pony, because she has wings. Someday, daddy always says, he'll teach Derpy how to fly.
Daddy said that most pegasiss ponies live in the sky but Derpy doesn't live in the sky because she can't fly. Derpy can't fly because she can't always move so good and sometimes she can't see so good, either. But someday, maybe Derpy will fly like mommy and daddy can and everyone can go live up in the sky with the other pegasiss ponies.
He says up in the sky is where they make rainbows and Derpy wants to see all those rainbows. She'll tell daddy all the colors she's learned if she can talk good by then. Daddy says Derpy is a “pegasiss” pony but mommy says Derpy is a “reetard” but daddy never told Derpy what that is.
Derpy really, really likes when daddy comes home, because daddy is nice and plays with Derpy and talks to Derpy but mommy always says “Derpy, go play somewhere else.” Mommy is always doing things like cleaning and things and even though Derpy tries to help she makes a mess sometimes because she can't move so good. And mommy cries sometimes too and then mommy has to take medicine to make her stop crying. Derpy cries sometimes but she doesn't need medicine. But today, mommy is happy and Derpy is happy and Miss Sweetie is happy. And when Derpy smells muffin smell, Derpy gets really happy.
Derpy runs real fast to the kitchen (she brings Miss Sweetie too, because Miss Sweetie likes muffins, but not as much as Derpy does) and she finds muffins there! Mommy says “Sit down over there, Derpy,” and she does.
Derpy puts Miss Sweetie down on the table (she can't eat muffins while she's holding Miss Sweetie and also Miss Sweetie tastes a little like yuck anyway) but mommy grabs Miss Sweetie and throws her into the other room. Derpy wants to go get Miss Sweetie but mommy pulls Derpy back and it hurts kinda and mommy says “No! Sit down!”
Derpy gets mad and swings her hoofs at mommy but mommy hits Derpy in her face and Derpy starts to cry. But then mommy puts lots of muffins down on the table and says “Be quiet, Derpy. Look, muffins,” and mommy is smiling so Derpy doesn't cry and she gets muffins, so it's okay.
Mommy pushes all the muffins in front of Derpy and says “Have as many as you like,” and Derpy gets one really fast! They aren't the purple ones, but she still likes them anyway. She eats a whole muffin all the way and then gets another one, but she can't finish that one all the way because she already feels a little sickish and the muffins don't taste as good as the purple ones. Mommy says “What's wrong? You're not done already, are you? Can't you finish at least one more?” and she pushes more muffins in front of Derpy but Derpy is already sickish so she wants to go play with Miss Sweetie now.
Derpy tries to play with Miss Sweetie but she feels real sickish now so she just takes Miss Sweetie over by the window and watches the sky. Daddy said the sky color is blue and she can see all the clouds and stuff and even some pegasiss ponies but not any rainbows.
Daddy comes home when the sky is all orange but Derpy can't see him because she's laying down by the window because she feels really, really sickish and her belly hurts really bad. She can't even squeeze Miss Sweetie because her belly hurts and daddy comes over and nuzzles her and says “Sweetie, are you okay?” but Derpy doesn't say anything and she can't cry either even though it hurts so bad. Then daddy gets loud and mommy gets loud but Derpy keeps looking out the window, but then daddy picks up Derpy and goes outside really fast. It hurts so much that she does cry now and she wants Miss Sweetie but she's still inside the house.
Daddy puts Derpy in her cart and ties her in so she doesn't climb out but she doesn't want to climb out anyway.
Daddy takes her to a place she's never been before and lots of big ponies in white hats and stuff are around and carrying her all over and it really hurts her belly but daddy is still there, too, even though she can't see good right now. They put Derpy on a bed and it's really cold and she's crying and one of the big ponies is making her eat something and daddy says “Sweetie, you're gonna be okay, alright? Just take this medicine. It'll be okay, I promise!” and she eats the medicine because daddy says to. Mommy takes medicine and it makes mommy stop crying so maybe this medicine will make Derpy stop crying but it's not working now though.
Derpy gets really tired and scared and hurting and all kinds of stuff happens and she can't remember too good or see too good either but she remembers daddy is there and then she wakes up and it doesn't hurt so much anymore. Daddy is by the bed and it's all bright and white inside and she can see daddy because her eyes aren't bad right now and he says “How do you feel, sweetie?” Daddy is gray colored and Derpy says “Sweetie” because that's one of the words she can say good. Daddy nuzzles Derpy in the neck and says “I love you so much,” and Derpy is still really sleepy and daddy made her neck wet because he was crying all over.
Derpy got to stay in that new place for lots of days and so did daddy but not mommy. There were lots of big ponies and even some little ponies and they were all nice to Derpy and she didn't break anything or make a mess the whole time while she was there so it was really fun.
But daddy said it was time to go home so they did. When mommy saw Derpy, she squeezed Derpy and said lots of things. Then everyone, mommy, and daddy, and Derpy spent all day together! They played together all day and everyone was really happy and saying lots of stuff and they even had muffins again! They were purple this time, and Derpy really likes the purple ones. And when it was time for bed, mommy and daddy stayed with Derpy the whole night! It was Derpy's most favorite day.
Derpy gets up really early in the morning with mommy and daddy because it's time for daddy to go to work. Everyone has food all at the same time today and Derpy isn't sleepy or anything. And when daddy has to go he kisses mommy and then he nuzzles Derpy and kisses her on top of her head and says “Be good, Sweetie. Daddy loves you,” and then he has to go even though she doesn't really want him to. After daddy leaves, Derpy gets really sleepy and she has to sleep on the floor where it's warm because the sun is in the window.
Next time Derpy wakes up because mommy wakes her up and says “Get up, Derpy. Hurry up, we're leaving,” and Derpy doesn't really know what to do but mommy pulls her up and Derpy grabs Miss Sweetie before they go this time.
Mommy keeps pushing Derpy to move faster but Derpy can't see good right now and she almost falls over sometimes. Then she puts Miss Sweetie inside her cart and gets in and then mommy starts pulling the cart even though Derpy didn't get tied in yet. But it's okay because Derpy has Miss Sweety and she's really soft and Derpy is still sleepy so she goes to sleep on Miss Sweetie for a little while.
When she wakes up the next time even, it's really cold and windy because they're up high and Derpy doesn't like going up high. Derpy gets scared when she looks outside the cart because they're high and also Derpy doesn't know where they are anyway. Daddy usually doesn't go up high when he takes Derpy somewhere. They're up high for a long, long time and Derpy starts to get really hungry but she's scared too so she just lays down in the cart and squeezes Miss Sweetie and she likes that because Miss Sweetie is warm. There's no clouds where they are and there's no pegasiss ponies or rainbows either. Then she has an idea and thinks maybe mommy is taking her back to that nice place that was fun and maybe daddy will be there too!
After an even longer long time it gets warm again and mommy comes over and says “Get up,” and pulls Derpy out of the cart by her tail and that hurts a little bit but not too much. Derpy looks around but it isn't the fun place but there are lots of trees all over and some grass and even some houses far away too. She looks at mommy and mommy says “Come here,” and goes to under a really big tree and tells Derpy to sit down under the tree and then takes a bowl out of one of her bags. Derpy is happy because she's really hungry and then mommy takes a bottle out and puts some stuff in the bowl but when Derpy tries to drink the stuff mommy says “No!”
So Derpy doesn't know what to do and then mommy takes a new thing out of her bag that's pink colored and says “Watch this. Mommy is gonna make you some bubbles,” and she takes the funny looking new thing and puts it in the stuff in the bowl and then takes it out and waves it around. And then there's bubbles! They float around all over and mommy starts laughing and Derpy starts laughing and she's really happy and then mommy says “Now you try!” and puts the funny thing back in the bowl.
Derpy reaches down and holds the funny thing with her teeth (it's because she can't always use her hoofs so good) and then picks it up and shakes her head all over and then there's more bubbles! Derpy laughs so much and she drops the funny thing but mommy just says “Here, make some more!” and puts the thing back in the bowl. Then Derpy grabs the thing again and makes more bubbles until the bubbles stop and Derpy doesn't know what to do but then she remembers and puts the thing back in the bowl and then takes it out and she can make more bubbles! Derpy makes bubbles until they're all over! Sometimes there's lots and sometimes there's only not lots. Sometimes Derpy just likes to watch the bubbles instead of making more. They move really slow sometimes and sometimes they don't move at all.
But best of all is how the bubbles all have rainbows in them! There's more colors than she's ever seen, and sometimes when she can't see good, there's even more bubbles with even more rainbows!
Credited to anonymous