Sagwa, the Chinese Siamese Cat: The Lost Episode

Before you ask about my origins, I'm not telling you how my life went before me.

I love Sagwa, the Chinese Siamese Cat. I have all of the episodes on DVD and VHS, from both official releases and recordings off various TV channels, and have a promotional poster on my house's wall. I once met Holly Gauthier-Frankel and her sign my mug with the Miao kitten family on it, hell I even started a message board called The Clubhouse where fans can interact. The educational PBS show about Siamese cats having adventures and learning life lessons puts on a smile on my face even though I'm 18 years old. I even started a Sagwa-themed rap/nu-metal band called "The Alley Cats", in which I do the rapping and my girlfriend DJ Sheegwa (her real (first) name is Clare) did the clean vocals. The other band members are Lik-Lik's Boi (his actual name's Mason) on the guitar, Ching Chang Chow (most people call him Teddy) on bass, and Super Miao (I call him Zick in private) on the drums. We have been performing gigs at comic cons up and down the East coast and we even got to perform at AthensCon in Greece, whilst waiting for some weird-ass anti-consumerist DIY record label to sign us.

When I say I’m a fan, I mean that I go out of my way to collect anything Sagwa-related. I was at the Rietta Flea Market in Hubbardston, Massachusetts on vacation, looking for, well, anything Sagwa-related. I was checking out a vendor's table. He had three Sagwa VHS tapes. The two VHS's I identified were Best Friends and Feline Festivities, but the third one was mysterious. It was just a recordable VHS with a piece of red duct tape stuck to it with written on text that said "SAGWA YOU'RE MY BEST FRIEND". I was puzzled about this, but I purchased the three tapes from the man operating the table. He said that he got the three tapes from a job lot, and the guy who gave him the lot seemed glad to have the third tape over with, and he told me that the man said that the tape felt like it was cursed. I did not heed his warning as I believed it to be a simple joke. Boy was I wrong.

When I arrived at my home in Agawam after a very long drive home, I waited until it was the morning to watch the tapes. I ate breakfast and then wondered what the tapes were as I looked over them. I got out my VCR and hooked it up to my TV, and then played through the first two tapes. They were normal as I have seen them before, as I have at least 5 copies each of them. The "Sagwa you're my best friend" tape was strange. I popped the tape in the VCR, and when I hit "play", the tape showed a screen which said "This tape contains content that may be frightening to younger viewers. PARENTAL DISCRETION IS HIGHLY ADVISED." I jokingly thought "Well, it was nice enough for the demonic entity that may or may not have conjured up this tape to include a content warning." to myself.

The tape then showed the Sagwa intro, but it was highly different.

Not finished yet...